I Must be Doing Something Wrong

It was while I was nursing my almost-nine-month old baby back to sleep, for like, the 4th time sometime last week, that it hit me: I Must be Doing Something Wrong!!!

 Noah, my first son, didn't sleep for the first six months of his  life. He was exclusively nursed and slept in the playpen in our room. (ERROR!) He wouldn't nap on his own either, so we made a habit of napping together,(ERROR!) which truth be told, I more than welcomed.  After he turned 4 months (and had taken a total  of only five bottles, (ERROR!) he wouldn't have any). Being alone to handle nights, (ERROR!) since he would only nurse, I guess we can say  that I was somewhat sleep deprived. Noah would wake about ten times a night from the time he was four months old, and then when he turned six months, we moved him into the crib in his own room,  (FINALLY DID SOMETHING RIGHT!) I he finally slept through the night.

Sleeping, or the lack thereof, was our major problem with Noah, but, as I said, as of six months of age, he would sleep 12 hours a night, to my great relief. My next issue with him, was the fact that he wouldn't take a bottle. We started him  early on the sippy cup, he would drink a little water, but he would never want any milk or formula in it. I was stressed about returning to work, and him not wanting any sort of milk. I was worried sick that my baby would be so thirsty and that he'd be missing out on the good stuff milk was supposed to give him. Too much worry for nothing. Turns out, he became a champ sippy cup drinker, and he has to this day, never taken any milk, hates it, can't swallow it, makes him puke... but guess what, he is, extremely healthy !*knock on wood*.

Now, my dear, sweet Logan... He is was my calm baby who liked to sleep. He had been doing really well. He's never really slept through the night, but he could go five-six hours without waking (and apparently, that is sleeping through he night for babies, ack!) But, and of course, there had to be a ''but'', when he turned five months old, he had a pretty harsh cold where he hardly slept, and since then, he's never slept really well. He also started teething right about that time too (and now has five teeth, and a sixth on the way)! Over the course of the last two weeks, he's been waking up almost every hour, and I have stupidly been nursing him back to sleep, (ERROR!) since it's the easiest and quickest way I'm back in bed. Also, Logan will have nothing to do with food. Well, he is interested in eating, he is just incapable of swallowing (and he's another one who wants nothing to do with the bottle), so of course, these aspects play in allowing him to nurse, seeing that I worry he's not getting all he needs from solids. Aye. I  realise that I'm pretty much shooting  myself in the foot, creating a bad habit, but I'm just waaayyyy too tired to let him cry it out, not feeding him, and I'm quasi-alone to do so. And, talk about not learning, he is, still sleeping in the playpen in our room.(ERROR!).. it just seems that putting up the crib in his room, is a project that gets placed on the backburner... (hint hint Dan)..... And to add to this rant, this one, who  isn't a great napper to start with, will have nothing to do with me napping with him!  Good grief! Someone throw me a bone!... but a valium will do!

So, looking at all this, how both my kids really didn't sleep well, or at all (!!!), didn't take the bottle, both had some type of feeding problem, it makes me look at myself and question if it's me... and when I try to convince myself that it isn't me, I look at the state of my house, and how we somehow have turned into some sorts of slobs, I realise that it is me, and that I Must be Doing Something Wrong... perhaps even  all of it. Oye.